Mind, Body & Spirit

“We are not human beings having a spiritual experience. We are spiritual beings having a human experience.”  ~ Teilhard de Chardin

In Western culture, we are now beginning to understand the importance of the physical, emotional and spiritual connectedness of overall personal wellness. I believe that in order to be well in one area - for example, physically - all other areas must also be well. How does one achieve this overall wellness?

Let’s break it down by category to give a brief overview of each, and then tie the three parts together to complete the picture.

Physical Wellness - Physical body, appearance, health, mental state: Food, quantity and quality of sleep, exercise, hydration, physical health, stress management, dis-ease prevention and management.

Emotional Wellness - Thoughts, self-love and appreciation, emotional intelligence: Self-reflection, self-perception, perception of others, communication, managing expectations and capacity to love unconditionally, forgive and experience gratitude.

Spiritual Wellness - Religion, faith, belief system: Meditation, prayer, journal writing, positive affirmations, positive thoughts, slowing down, deep breathing and time to oneself.

There are many schools of thought on the origins of dis-ease, but most can be traced to some form of physical tension or stress in the body, which is often caused or exacerbated by emotional distress or discomfort. Whether one believes that specific emotional distress causes specific physical ailments, we all understand that the effects of prolonged stress on the physical body and emotional state can be detrimental to health and wellbeing.

According to the Mayo Clinic, stress can significantly affect your body, mood and behavior. Stress can also contribute to headaches, muscle tension, high blood pressure, heart problems, diabetes, skin conditions, asthma, arthritis, depression, decreased libido, stomach upset, sleep disruptions, irritability, lack of motivation and focus, over- or under-eating, drug or alcohol abuse and anxiety.

Ensuring adequate nutrition, hydration, exercise and sleep is one way to relieve the stress of daily life. While tending to our physical needs, it is also very important to build our tribe of support around us to help us with our emotional needs. Developing a spiritual practice of regular prayer or meditation, deep breathing exercises and yoga or gentle stretching and energy work such as Reike, build the foundation for healing, restoration, and nourishing the body, mind and spirit.**

**As a coach and as a living human being, my approach to all areas of life is holistic in nature. I will only share insights that I believe to be helpful, reminding you to check-in with yourself, your physician or mental health care provider. Sometimes it takes a team of experts to bring us back into balance physically, emotionally and spiritually. When you have the right team in place, you are more likely to reach the level of success you desire. If you have not found answers to your questions, I highly encourage you to keep asking until you find an answer that provides a viable solution that not only meets you where you are, but takes you where you want to be in terms of your physical, emotional and spiritual wellbeing.

A Tutorial in Gratitude

“Your daily life is your temple and your religion. When you enter into it take with you your all.” - Kahlil Gibran I love this quote, and I love anything written by Kahlil Gibran. I am sure some feathers might experience a little ruffling with the temple and religion reference, but I am certain if you are here to read this blog, you can get around that to continue reading. So, join me for a lesson in developing an attitude of gratitude.

I am tempted to launch into a lecture about ungrateful behavior, but that seems, well, ungrateful. I am grateful for the examples of ingratitude I can reference in my own mind, because they shine a light on areas in need of improvement in my life. I believe that every person enters our lives for a reason, even if “just” someone you witness while running errands. Have you ever noticed bad behavior, and then found yourself judging the person? I sure have. I think myself relatively non-judgmental, but I catch myself in that old pattern once in a while. I did this morning while sitting in the waiting room at urgent care with my daughter (all is well, thankfully).

A very young woman with an adorable two-year old daughter tall enough to be four or five, and heavy enough to be considered obese, was also waiting. I first caught myself judging her for allowing her child to be overweight. Then I caught myself judging her for talking about how bright and articulate her little girl was. After that I caught myself judging her for how loudly she was chastising her sweet little girl for climbing on the chairs (she is only two after all.) I suddenly realized how easy it was for me to slip into the judgmental mode, and stopped myself immediately - but not until I had already consciously judged her at least three times. I reminded myself that everyone has their own story, and it’s none of my business how someone else raises their children unless I witness abuse; then all bets are off. You might be wondering why I am talking about my judgmental attitude if I am writing about gratitude. In catching myself judging a fellow mother, I realized that I go to that judgmental place when I am fearful, for whatever reason, and it is my way of deflecting responsibility - a very clear example of a lack of gratitude.

Along the lines of fearfulness and a need to shift to gratitude, I will share another personal story. When my daughter was born, she failed her hearing test in the hospital. When she failed it again at an audiologist’s office three weeks later, I was really scared. I had no idea what a ‘failed hearing test’ meant - if my daughter was deaf, if we would need to learn sign language, how that would affect our family, if kids would tease her for wearing hearing aids, and the list of fears goes on. By the time all of the testing was complete, she was diagnosed with a mild-to-moderate hearing loss, and received her first pair of hearing aids at just 9 weeks old. In the very moment the audiologist turned her aids on, and was speaking to us about how to use them, my beautiful baby turned her head, looked right at the audiologist and cooed, as if to say, “OH! That’s how you sound! Thank you!” Tears of joy, relief, and most importantly, gratitude, flowed freely.

In grappling with the uncertainty, I found myself saying, “This is not life-threatening. Her heart and all life-sustaining organs function perfectly well. She is healthy.” But until I had some kind of “proof” that she was going to be OK, those thoughts were scarcely enough. In the time that has passed - my daughter is now eight - life has brought me numerous opportunities to move from scared, worried, angry and negative to grateful. Sometimes I find myself expressing gratitude for a lesson I’m about learn, for in the midst of a trial, I cannot see the wisdom, but I trust that I will learn from it.

I share these personal stories to help you understand that we are all learning, always. We are beautiful works in progress, and every day we can learn something new. Waking up ready to embrace each day and learn from it is a step toward an attitude of gratitude. How else can you shift your thinking and ultimately free yourself from negativity, self-sabotage and other unnecessary burdens? There are a number of ways, and I will address two starting points: change your vocabulary and look for the silver lining. I will likely write more on gratitude at a later date.

Change your vocabulary. Yes, it’s that simple. Change your speech and thought patterns:

Instead of	Change to
“Try”	“I do”
“I should do X”	“I could do X; I choose Y”
“Have to”	“I intend”
“I don’t have enough money”	“I am blessed with abundance”
(an immediate) “No”	“Hmm, let me think about that”
“This always happens to me”	“I’m grateful to recognize a pattern I can change”

 

Look for the silver lining. That may sound a little pie-in-the-sky (in the true meaning: promising heaven while continuing to suffer on earth) but I assure you that when you look for the positive in things, you will begin to find it. Does that mean you will live a life free of difficulties and trials? Absolutely not, but how you handle life’s ups and downs is key. Find the good in things. Remember there is always opportunity to learn. For that, I am always grateful.

I wish you the best on your journey as you make small changes that have tremendous impact, and I am grateful for you.

Blessings. Gratitude. Love.