Do YOU Experience Growing Pains? How Do You Know?

How do you know when you are experiencing growing pains? Young children often experience pain in their legs, the cause of which is difficult to pinpoint. Because growing pains is not actually a medical condition, doctors call it a “diagnosis of exclusion”. Excluding other potential maladies or injuries is the first order of business, and by exclusion, many parents find that their child is experiencing the general muscular discomfort referred to as “growing pains”. Consensus in the medical community is that bone growth does not cause pain. However, many children experience more growing pains during the rapid growth stages, into early adolescence. It is understood is that many children experience these pains after a very physically active day, and often for several days and nights in a row. Most doctors agree that the treatment for growing pains is a warm compress, massage and cuddling - a little TLC, if you will (insert winky smile at clever reference to my initials.)

If we piggy-back on a child’s experience of growing pains and the doctor’s diagnosis of exclusion, we may apply this to our own experience as adults. Have you ever gone through a difficult time, and yet all other variables seem to be in place? I certainly have. There have been times when I’ve felt stressed, afraid and overwhelmed, and yet so much good stuff was happening in my life. By process of elimination (or exclusion), I often find that during these times, I am experiencing growing pains - a general discomfort associated with a sustained high level of activity.

Think about it. We grow and stretch, and stretch a little more, and leap and stretch, and duck and dodge bullets, and deftly maneuver around roadblocks every day. When you experience an unexplained sense of discomfort, or possibly pain, which could manifest in the forms of sadness, anger, frustration or apathy (however fleetingly temporary), it is helpful to run through your personal checklist of needs, unmet needs and possible adverse health conditions if you have any. If you turn up empty handed, give a nod to the idea of growing pains. Perhaps you have been so active that your whole being needs to rest and recuperate.

The doctor’s diagnosis of growing pains, and the parent’s remedy is simple: rest, warm compress, massage and cuddling - a little TLC. We often barge ahead in life, rapidly barreling forward, without taking a moment to address some of our basic needs. We all need TLC, love, a massage and the equivalent of a warm compress. Reach out to those who are close to you. Ask for some extra support in the form of kind words, a listening ear, a hug or thoughts/prayer. At the same time, be kind and compassionate with yourself. Make sure you have attended to your needs. Pushing through the pain is sometimes recommended, and sometimes rest and recuperation are just what the doctor ordered. Know yourself well enough to distinguish what you really need.

If you want to learn more about establishing the mindset for growing thru your growing pains and achieving blissful success, schedule your COMPLIMENTARY 30 minute consult.

I am here by your side on your journey, cheering you on, applying the warm compress, and offering a lot of TLC. Know that you are fully supported in your dreams, and you WILL manifest them!

Blessings. Gratitude. Love.

Zen and the Art of Awesomeness

Zen and the art of what?! Here's the deal. Being awesome is something that can be achieved by simply being in the moment, and by being yourself. Y'know, "Zen". Sometimes my clients tell me, "I should really meditate more, but I'm not good at meditation. I guess I'm just not Zen." Huh? How does one become 'good' at meditation and ‘being Zen’? I do not fancy myself a meditation expert by any stretch, but I'll share my personal belief about meditation, awesomeness and becoming more Zen. Step into the moment. Stepping into the present moment takes practice, just like learning another skill, sport or musical instrument.

Zen and the "art of awesomeness" is simply being in the moment. We can be in the moment by checking in with ourselves, breathing deeply and often, and by slowing down to notice what is going on around us and inside of us.

Let’s back up for just a moment, though. What’s up with this self-judgment? I hear “I should” and “I’m not good at” and “I guess I’m just not” a lot. Bim, bam, boom. Stop there. Pause, interrupt the pattern, breathe and then move forward.

"Zen spirituality does not confuse spirituality with thinking about God while one is peeling potatoes. Zen spirituality is just to peel the potatoes." ~ Alan Watts

You see, when we slow down and step into the moment, we achieve a Zen-like state. When we pause to check-in with ourselves, we create the foundation for meditation, Zen-like states and mindful presence.

Here are some quick tips to get started with a practice of being present so you can readily and easily step into your awesomeness every day (some call this “flow state” or “in the zone”).

1. Breathe deeply and often. You do not need to be stressed or seeking relaxation to breathe deeply. Just be aware of your breath, and pay attention to some of your breaths throughout the day. You will find at times you need to breathe deeply, and other times you will not. By taking deep breaths, you are being proactive about your health: manage your stress, blood pressure and heart rate, and oxygenate your cells. You will help the flow of energy and improve your posture. How’s that for feeling virtuous? Now you’re stepping into awesomeness.
2. Slow down to speed up. I’ve been saying this to clients, class and seminar participants. I tell it to my kids. And......sometimes (okay, quite often) I need to remind myself. Sometimes we need to slow down in order to speed up. Every step of the journey is important, no matter the final destination. If you want to succeed in any area of your life, you will develop this habit. Take the time to write your goals by hand every day, write 3 actionable items on your list (and finish them) every day, and reflect on your accomplishments at the end of the day. Slow down in order to speed up; these 3 small habits take all of 2 minutes and yet launch you forward at warp speed, if you will allow it.
3. Peel the potato. Do nothing more than what you are currently doing. Dedicate your focus, attention, energy and intention to one thing at a time. Multi-tasking as a means of efficiently completing tasks is a farce, and diverts and dilutes your attention, changing the outcome - much like water to paint. Shift gears between tasks. Close the book (even if temporarily) on one actionable item before moving to the next. Give your brain time to adjust and switch gears. Studies show that it can take up to 15 minutes for the brain to fully close-out and switch to the new action when one attempts to manage multiple tasks at once. Focus, grasshopper. You will accomplish more and you will feel more grounded.

As you travel along your path, know that you are fully supported, and I honor your experience as your own. If you would like to learn more about building the foundation for superb awesomeness, I am here. I offer unwavering support, and would be honored to be by your side.

Blessings. Gratitude. Love.

Lessons from the Cosmos (Flower)

 There is a certain beauty in wildflowers that is a little hard to put into words. I first became fascinated with Cosmos (Mexican Aster) when I was in graduate school in New Mexico. The feathery greens, bright punches of color and ability to thrive even under gross neglect seemed so symbolic, and in many ways speaks to stretches of my life experience.

The Cosmos flowers can stand from one to five feet tall and never require support, despite having a relatively thin stem. Cosmos are pest-resistant, and when fertilized, tend to grow more green than flowers. Even after days without water in triple digit summer heat, the flowers remain beautiful, and the green lush.

You may be wondering how in the world I am drawing a connection from neglect-loving, thin stemmed flowers to living an exquisite life. It is simple, and on this lovely Earth Day, it seems fitting to draw some connections from nature.

1. Appearances can be deceiving. People often appear one way on the outside, yet what is inside is very different. I think of Audrey Hepburn as a shining example of a person who appeared very soft on the outside, and yet was possessed with admirable strength and conviction of character (after retiring from acting, she became special ambassador to the United Nations UNICEF fund helping children in developing nations). We also see the opposite: someone who appears very strong on the outside, and yet is suffering on the inside.  In both examples, what we see on the outside is quite different from the real inside story.
2. You have everything you need, and ample reserves. There are times in life when you may feel depleted, as if you do not have energy or resources to continue. The truth is, however, that we always have everything we need, with plenty of reserves. Think of a time when you did something very physically challenging (for me, running or pushups), and in the moment when you wanted to give up, your body came through for you. You found the extra something you needed to finish, to get where you needed to go, or to feel virtuous about crushing a challenge. Whatever your reasons, my point is simple: often our brains scream at us based on old garbage messages, when in reality we have plenty of energy to keep going.
3. There is no need to over-protect ourselves or our loved ones; we thrive and grow from our experiences. Sometimes people over-water and over-fertilize their gardens and end up with mushy, squishy mud. The same is true in life. You do not always need to go get more information before taking-on a challenge. You do not always need to gear-up for what lies ahead in order to protect yourself. Sometimes for ourselves and for our loved ones, we really need to learn to let go and trust. Trust ourselves, trust the process, trust our source.
4. Stand tall, no matter how frail you may feel, no matter how strong the wind. Be flexible and allow yourself to bend, but not break. If you break, you know how to repair yourself already, don’t you? Stand firm in who you are, grounded in that calm knowing, and trust in yourself, the process and your source. You’ve got this.

You see, we are like the Cosmos; delicate yet strong, self-sufficient yet interconnected, vulnerable yet protected, flexible yet firmly planted. Know that you’ve got what it takes to accomplish anything you dream and reach an absolutely exquisite sense of fulfillment and unspeakable joy. You are worth it, and the journey is worth it.

Blessings. Gratitude. Love.

"Love is the only flower that grows and blossoms without the aid of the seasons."                             - Kahlil Gibran

Lighten UP! Shift your perspective and learn to experience joy

“Most of the time I don’t have much fun. The rest of the time I don’t have any fun at all.”  – Woody Allen Ah, good ‘ole Woody Allen, the master of neurotic, self-pitying quotes. I know some people who view life the way this quote reads, so now I feel compelled to write about having fun. A number of people in my circle have expressed frustration at not having time to enjoy themselves, being too ingrained in their routinized lives, and just a general lack of joy. I see it in the faces and body language of people I work with and in those I watch as I take-in my surroundings, and I have to ask: when did we switch from living to surviving?

We are taught to be responsible, contribute to society and “be serious.” I can think of several times when I’ve said those things to my children because they were too busy having fun to listen to me or do their chores. In my moment of over-scheduled, harried mom trying to get it all done, I have overlooked their joy and interpreted their dismissal of my requests as rudeness or disrespect when they were simply enjoying the moment and living their lives. We could all take a page from a child’s life book and lighten up a little.

Obviously, there are times to be serious and times to be playful, but these do not have to live entirely separate existences. If we take a moment to find the joy in living, we can all have a little more fun. It really is simple, and I have broken it down into simple steps.

1. Choose to find the good in things. If you find yourself commiserating with Woody Allen, and many of us have at some point in our lives, then the first step is to shift your perspective and choose to find the good in things. I wrote an affirmation for one of my children, and find myself repeating it to myself in moments of negativity: “I choose to find the good in things and be happy.” If you catch yourself slipping into a negative thought pattern, repeat the affirmation five times. If you have never used positive affirmations, it might seem a little strange at first, but just give it a try; you might be surprised how this small change will shift your thinking.

“Joy is the feeling of grinning inside.” - Melba Colgrove

Notice I did not provide a definition of happiness. There is no outline or format to follow, just a value statement to make for yourself that will help you re-program your thinking to believe that happiness is a choice, and that you deserve it. When you choose to allow yourself to experience what you believe you deserve, you have already begun to change your life and invite more joy.

2. Break the rules. We all have a rebellious streak in us, yet somewhere between adolescence and adulthood, most of us abandoned it for rule-following, proper behavior and keeping up appearances. I would never suggest disrespectful behavior toward others or felonious activity, but why not let yourself be a little naughty once in a while? I think Katharine Hepburn was on to something when she said, “If you obey all the rules, you miss all the fun.” Give yourself permission to step outside the box to experience things just a little differently. Stay out past your bedtime, eat dessert before dinner, laugh out loud in public, dance on tables…you get the gist.

”I am not in this world to live up to other people’s expectations, nor do I feel that the world must live up to mine.” – Fritz Perls

3. Let go of expectations that hold you back. Those of us who are “recovering type-A” personalities already realize that we place high expectations on ourselves. Our standards are often impossibly high and we rarely live up to them. In addition, we set similarly impossible standards for others, and find ourselves continually disappointed in people. Here is an opportunity to try something radical: let go of the belief that others can make you happy. You are in charge of your happiness. You have the choice to be happy. People’s actions may affect you, but the key to your happiness is in your hands.

4. Allow yourself to experience joy every day. After you have chosen to believe that you deserve to be happy and have abandoned the rules and expectations that hold you back, you have paved the way to truly experience joy. You only need to open your eyes a little, stop to “smell the roses,” so to speak. Think about things that make you smile, and look for them as you go about your day. You will become more aware of your surroundings, begin to experience good feelings and notice other things that bring you joy. If you enjoy social time with friends, make a point of scheduling time with them. If you love music, play your favorite tunes and just listen, or dance around your house.

We all lead busy lives, and with technology and round the clock access, it is so easy to slip into the “grind” mentality and feel continually obligated to spend our time working or adding tasks to the to do list. This is not a healthy, balanced lifestyle. As creatures of habit, our bodies will adjust to whatever routine we impose, so why not create time every day for down-time, time to decompress and have a little fun? Give yourself permission to let something go on the to do list (or better yet, ditch the list; you will always do what is important, right?)

There are opportunities to experience joy every day, if you open your heart to see what is out there. When you make the slightest change in one area of your life, it will spill-over into other areas. Shift your perspective toward finding the good; it will take some re-training to change your thought patterns, but it is well worth the effort. You can alter the course of your life by giving yourself permission to experience fun and joy. I wish you the best, most joyful day and know you are fully capable of changing your life.

Blessings. Gratitude. Love.

SUCCESS: You get to choose

Today I really wanted to write something flowery about how you deserve an exquisite life, and I believe that. However, for the last several days, I have been home with a sick kid, got the same virus and now am looking out the window at freezing rain. Frankly, as loving and nurturing as I am, I’m just not feeling it today. So, you get a gritty-for-me, sassified chat. I’ve been seeing a lot of posts on Facebook lately that feel very judgmental and remind us that we’re responsible for our own happiness AND misery, to stop making excuses and that have a strong tone of “you only have yourself to blame,” etc. Here’s the deal: shit happens. Life happens. There are times when it seems things won’t go right, and there are times when life feels heavy. It’s what we choose to do with these times that really matters.

So, life happens. Life sometimes feels heavy. There are times when you won’t be able to make it to the gym, you will miss your meditation or you will eat or drink the “wrong” stuff. If you choose to throw the proverbial baby out with the bathwater, then you are choosing that. That is one choice. I will ask you this, and I know I’ve used this analogy before, but it works: if you are wearing a white shirt at a party and a drop of red salsa falls on it, will you pick up the whole bowl of salsa and pour it down your shirt? If you do, bravo/a for making a Powerful Choice! And if not, that is also a Powerful Choice (wink, wink).

You see, whatever you choose, even if you choose to walk in circles and not make a decision, you are making a choice. It is simple. When life throws some crap at the fan and it’s blowing all over, you get to choose: let it hit you, turn and run, grab an umbrella and cover up, or walk around the friggin’ fan and pull the plug. YOU are in command of your life. YOU get to choose how things will go down once they happen, and frankly, THAT is what really counts.

Here are 3 simple steps to deal with Life Happening:

1. Breathe. When life happens, stop what you are doing and take a deep breath. Breathe in thru your nose, hold it for a second, and then breathe out thru your nose. Focus on your breath. When you breathe like this (in yoga: ujjayi pranayama) you do a number positive things for yourself, including bringing yourself into the present moment, lowering your blood pressure, slowing down your heart rate, releasing tension and keeping yourself from any knee-jerk reaction that may be associated with old programming that no longer serves you, if it ever did.
2. Allow feelings. We often make the mistake of rushing to feel better in the moment of Life Happening. Sometimes we need to switch gears to un-do old programming, but often what we are really doing is stuffing-down our feelings and burying them. To quote a powerful book: feelings buried alive never die. Whatever we stuff down will ultimately back up on us. If we understand that we feel first, then think, then emote, it is easier for us to learn to breathe and rest-in to our feelings and allow whatever we feel to actually be felt. From there, we can heal. Also, remember that feeling feelings and expressing emotions are very different. In the moment you feel something, you get to choose what to do with it.
3. Make a choice. After you take a deep breath (or 3, or 10) and have allowed yourself to feel what you feel, you get to make a choice. Choosing is a form of taking action. You may simply choose to change your attitude, and that is action. You may choose to change something - make an apology, forgive yourself or someone else, or rearrange your closet. Whatever you do, make a solid choice, and the universe/god/your source/your higher conscience will conspire to meet you where you are in that choice.

“I discovered I always have choices and sometimes it’s only a choice of attitude.”      - Unknown

Whatever you choose, you will do it in a powerful way, and it will be the right thing, even if the outcome is not what you expected or thought you wanted. You see, life happens. Life brings us exactly what we need, when we need it, and we get to choose to experience it as a learning opportunity or as a heavy burden that makes us miserable.

I know you will choose wisely and you will choose whatever you need most, even if you are not fully aware of why you are making the choice.

Blessings. Gratitude. Love.

P.S. It’s still January, and I’m still offering FREE GOODIES. Have you asked me for a freebie? If not, why not? Contact me, and make sure you leave your name & email in the box at the TOP RIGHT of this page so you get your first batch of free stuff. Make sure you ASK ME for more free stuff!

Keep it cool: FAN yourself with love

“The most important thing in life is to learn how to give out love, and to let it come in.” - Morrie Schwartz At some point, I knew I would write about love. I have referenced romantic and familial love and have touched on self-love, but today it’s all about loving the self. I once heard someone say that you cannot give away something you don’t have. So, how can we love another, and receive their unconditional love, if we do not first love ourselves?

Can you honestly say that you love yourself unconditionally? Are you proud of yourself and your accomplishments, and do you take time to nurture yourself? By nurture, I mean give yourself time to heal from emotional wounds, read, rest, say kind things to and of yourself, recover, think, sleep, listen to music, go for a hike, or whatever it is that you need to feel like you are caring for yourself. Many of us “take care of ourselves” by exercising, eating healthy foods and getting enough rest, etc., but what about nurturing? Do you forgive yourself your mistakes, accept yourself as you are and facilitate your personal growth?

We tend to think of personal growth as something that requires time spent on a couch “talking it thru,” going to large rallies or some other investment. In the true Power, Strength, Grace fashion, I will make it much simpler. To be clear, I place high value on the assistance of mental health professionals, and I was able to work thru some extremely difficult experiences and get to where I am today with the assistance of a supportive and gifted therapist.

You need to dig thru your garbage, in your own way. However, in addition to digging in the muck of past experiences and negativity, you can simply treat yourself with love. It is not easy to un-do negative thought patterns and change how you view yourself, but I can help you get the ball rolling. So, I am here to teach you how to keep it cool and FAN yourself with love.

First, back up for a minute, if you will, and entertain a bit about me. If you know me or have followed my posts or blog, then you know I have been thru a lot of change and challenge in the last couple of years. I ended my marriage, had a job plop in my lap after many years out of the paid workforce, and ultimately chose to leave that job to pursue my passion. In the process, I have chosen, and been forced, to work thru some very dark moments. I have dug in the muck, faced a number of previously crippling fears, and ventured out into the world as a completely transformed, re-born person. All this said, practicing self-love was never something I would have considered before because, frankly, it sounds pretty hokey to my rational mind.

That said, self-love is the best place to start the healing process, and quickly. Obviously awareness that you need to make a change will precede this, but if you are reading today and seeking guidance, I feel safe assuming that you have gotten past the recognition stage. So, let’s get to loving ourselves. I have broken it down into three steps: Forgive yourself, Accept yourself and your circumstances, and Nurture yourself. You do not need to go in any certain order; I am spelling FAN so you can remember it easily.

Forgive Yourself. Be forgiving of yourself. Let go of the mistakes you’ve made, even if you have hurt people along the way. If you feel responsible for hurting someone, forgive yourself, ask for forgiveness from that person/people, and move on. If a personal apology is not possible, write a heart-felt letter that you either send or do not send. Maybe write a letter forgiving yourself your imperfections and file it. Better, write it in a journal or notebook and picture wrapping it with love and letting it go. Name the hurt, shame, criticism and agony. Be lovingly forgiving, as you would with a child. Send each tidbit off to the universe/heavens/God/Cosmos in a bubble of love. Watch it float away. Too much? OK, just name it, write it on the paper, leave it behind, and move on without the ritual. You are human, will make mistakes, and the sooner you let go of impossibly high expectations, the better off you will be.

Accept Yourself (and your circumstances.) You are a beautiful creature, part of the human race; we are all beautiful and offer so many gifts. You will stumble and pick yourself up, and you will make mistakes and learn from them. View your mistakes and imperfections as part of the learning process on this wonderful journey. Let yourself be yourself and recognize that you are incredible, warts and all. This is a great time to write an affirmation about your qualities, gifts and potential. Write a list of positive attributes about yourself. You might struggle with this if you are new to self-love. That’s OK, just find anything positive to say about yourself, such as, “I am an excellent gardener.” You can further develop your affirmations as you begin to feel comfortable with using positive vocabulary.

Nurture Yourself. Self-nurturance is one of the more challenging concepts because we are programmed to dish-out loving care to others, but to do the same for ourselves is viewed as selfish and indulgent, and that does not sit well on the palate. I believe I once said, “Get over it” and I think that applies nicely here. Get over the negative connotations and get to loving yourself. Nurturing the self is very simple, and doesn’t require a lot of time, energy or money. You simply need to begin treating yourself in a loving manner. Start by writing yourself a love letter, or write a letter to yourself as a child. Share things with yourself that only you would know, tell yourself what you see, your potential for greatness, and let yourself feel the warmth of you loving yourself.

Part of personal development is to love and accept the self. Accepting ourselves does not mean giving up on making improvements, but how can we lovingly warm-up our home if we don’t feel it? How can we love our partner, children or other family members if we do not love ourselves first? We cannot give out that which we do not possess. I recently tweeted the following, and it will be included in the opening pages of my upcoming book:

"Prepare your heart. Move your body. Release what no longer serves you, and invite loving care into your life." ~ TLC

When you let love in, you will be able to give love out freely and honestly. Give it a try.

Blessings. Gratitude. Love.

Pain and Suffering: Healing and growing through acceptance

“Out of suffering have emerged the strongest souls; the most massive characters are seared with scars.” - Kahlil Gibran What a powerful statement. We’ve all heard the phrase, “What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger,” right? I suppose that is true, but I do not like the negative connotation, because my literal mind interprets that to mean that great suffering is always negative or that some form of death is imminent. Suffering and pain are a natural part of life. Stuff happens. Life happens, and we cannot control that. We can, however, control how we view life and what we make of our experiences. We can accept the lot we are given and not only make the best of it, but move it the direction we want it to go.

If out of suffering emerge the strongest of souls, then perhaps we need to reach deep down to decide how to use the difficult periods in our lives to build our character and emerge from the ashes stronger, more powerful and ready for action. We all have our own story, and if you know me personally or follow this blog, then you know that I’ve had a significant amount of life change in the past couple of years. Much of that change arose from profoundly painful decisions and experiences, but those were necessary in order for me to find my way to where I am now.

I used my pain as the impetus to start my new life. I will not say I have been able to to this with grace and dignity every step of the way, but I do my best every day given the circumstances and the resources I have (energy, emotional intelligence, time, strength.) I believe scars show as reminders of what we have learned, and will fade over time. I also believe, however, that the challenge is to keep the scars from hindering our ability to continue to move, as some scar tissue does after injury or surgery. This is a strong metaphor. If we leave our painful experiences in place and do nothing to massage, stretch or heal the damaged ares, we will eventually lose some of our mobility.

When the physical body sustains an injury or is recovering from surgery, there are three distinct stages of healing: Acute Inflammation, Repair and Remodeling. I compare the emotional and spiritual healing process to the physical, because I believe that the mind, body and spirit are interconnected, and frankly, linking our emotional healing to something tangible like tissue repair can give us hope and focus. The end of a relationship is an excellent example of the need for healing and recovery.

Almost everyone has experienced the loss of a relationship, either by their own choice or by the other person’s choice. It hurts, is often a blow to the ego and emotions, and can take some time to recover.

Stage 1. Acute Inflammation. This is the time immediately following injury. When a relationship ends, there is a period of pain, sometimes experienced as anger, hurt, frustration, sadness or some combination thereof. As with physical injury, this is very normal. The immediate response is pain, swelling, heat and redness. Inflammation is an imperative part of healing because it helps defuse the toxins to allow the healing process to begin. Plainly stated, we have to feel the injury, the pain, swelling of emotions, and discomfort in order to rid our system of the toxins and negativity that would otherwise fester into something far worse and potentially more damaging. As inflammation decreases, the repair process can begin.

Stage 2. Repair. Damaged structures begin the repair process by forming new connective tissues. This is a fragile time when the injury should not be touched. Only gentle stretching, beginning slowly, and gradually building in intensity over time. At this point, the healing process is building toward remodeling, the final stage.

There is always a period of time after a relationship ends when we need to get ourselves right before we “move on” to another relationship. There is no definite timeframe for this, but we all know we need to take the time to heal, work on figuring ourselves out, learning what we need to learn. This is the time when we are most fragile, and as with physical healing, it is recommended that you allow yourself to heal before hitting the ground running again.

Stage 3. Remodeling. This is the time when you need to take a more active role in your healing. Damaged tissues can be “remodeled” thru a series of range of movement exercises. How fantastically symbolic! Once you have experienced the pain of the injury, given yourself time to feel the pain, allowed the inflammation to push the toxins out of your system, gently eased back into life - into a more active role in your recovery - then you can really remodel and reshape your life.

Taking into account the natural healing process, we can treat difficult times as we would an injury or recovery from surgery by taking this attitude: “Here I am, what now?" or, "It is what it is, now what?” We accept that something has happened, and now we need to recover from it. How do we best do this? It seems for the most part that we readily accept a physical injury and the need to heal from it, but emotionally and spiritually, this presents as a larger challenge. If we change one thing, our perspective, and just accept that we need to heal and move forward, we will already begin to grow in the right direction.

“In the difficult are the friendly forces, the hands that work on us.” - Rainer Maria Rilke

We have the real opportunity to live fully, with deep meaning and fulfillment. We can all get there with acceptance, love and faith. Allow the hard times to help shape the amazing path in front of you. Let yourself feel the pain, let it flow, and then take an active part in your recovery and keep moving forward. As you travel in this amazing journey called life, you will encounter bumps, twists and turns; this is your time to make that jagged path into something beautiful.

Blessings. Gratitude. Love.

Crystal, “Woo-Woo Magic” and Getting What You Want

“Attention energizes; intention transforms.” - Dr. Deepak Chopra We have heard that whatever we choose to focus on, we enliven and enlarge. Have you ever noticed that when you want something, say a new car, the one you want seems to pop up everywhere? When you’re in a good mood looking for parking, do you notice that the “parking gods” seem to smile upon you and a convenient spot pops up for you? How about if you thought about having a baby; did you ever notice how many babies or pregnant women seemed to pop into your existence? The same is true for what we don’t want. Have you ever started your day off on the wrong foot and noticed that everything went wrong?

Often we know what we don’t want, but when asked what we do want, we struggle with the answer. I sometimes hear from new clients how things seem to keep going in the wrong direction, particularly in certain areas of their lives. For some, it is around relationships, for others, money. For some, it is recapturing their health in the form of a healthy weight, physical fitness or simply the energy to complete daily tasks in their busy lives.

What happens when we become mired in thoughts around what we don’t want is that we attract more of what we don’t want. Simple enough, right? Taking a not-so-big logical leap, we can also say that when we become mired in thoughts around what we do want, we will attract more of that as well. Here is where the “Crystal, ‘Woo-Woo Magic’ and Getting What You Want” comes into play. There’s nothing mysterious or woo-woo about this, really, but it is quite magical. When you focus on what you want, you will attract more of what you want.

The key to really getting what you want is becoming crystal clear about it. The quote by Chopra above states it beautifully: attention energizes; intention transforms. So, before we focus-in on getting what we want, we need to be so clear about what it is so that we can set the intention of bringing it into our lives. There are many schools of thought on how to do this, but to me it is very simple:

1. Dream Big. Ask yourself this: “If I could wave a magic wand and have exactly what I want, how would that look?” Allow yourself to think outside of what you think you ‘ought to’ or ‘should’ have. Go for what you really want and start to envision that. Close your eyes and picture it, in detail. Notice colors, sensations and maybe even smells or sounds.
2. Notice Negativity and Release It. Do not resist the negative thoughts that arise. If you find yourself thinking, “That will NEVER happen! How silly to wish for something so outrageous!” do not resist the feeling. Acknowledge it, allow it to flow thru and out, and then make a choice to either believe the negative thought or not to believe it.
3. Take Action. Once you know what you really want, don’t worry too much about drawing-up the plan. When you know what you want and set your intention, the “how” and the steps needed make themselves very clear. Does this mean to not get organized or use plans? Not at all, but if you are clear on what you want, then even the making of the plan gets you closer to your dream. Take one step toward your goal or dream every day. Break it down, be inspired, tap-in to your vision and your intention, and watch your dream move closer to you every day.

This is the “woo-woo magic” of the Law of Attraction, Law of Intention and Law of Least Effort combined. You don’t need to understand or even pay attention to these laws. Just keep in mind that whatever we choose to give attention to, we enliven.

So, dream big, set your intention and take action. It’s that simple.

Blessings. Gratitude. Love.

(Photo credit: http://hopeinvain.com)

Learning to Fly - a personal note from Tracy

I wanted to share something personal with you this week - a learning experience worth sharing. I have been digging deeper in my own personal development work, and encountered some deep-seated fears and old feelings that no longer serve me. I have always been quite courageous and willing to take action in spite of fear, but I’ll be VERY honest: I wanted to throw my hands in the air and just run away. Of course, that feeling only lasts for a fleeting moment, but in getting to ‘that place’ and allowing myself to feel the feelings associated with the thoughts, I discovered a strength I had yet to fully tap into - the ability to let go. To really let go. To allow myself to explore the worst fear, visualize what that might bring me, how “bad” it could possibly be. The feelings associated with the fear were enlightening; I discovered that I had developed the habit of holding tension and negative feelings in my body. I also discovered intense anger when I allowed the feelings to bubble-up. Once I allowed myself to feel which feelings and emotions were attached to the thoughts and fears, compassion and tenderness overtook me. From that compassion came the release. I felt for the first time that I had let go of the hold I had let the past have on me that was keeping me from reaching some of my goals, and worse: kept me from believing I deserve to achieve them.

Have you ever wondered why you “can’t” get past something, or why you’re not able to reach your goals fully, or why things “keep happening”? It is entirely possible that you have not released the thoughts AND feelings that aren’t truly aligned with who you are today. We often go to therapy, work thru our past and think we should be prepared to go flying straight ahead... This is not usually the case.

Though it’s not easy, there is a simple process you can work thru to learn how to let go and set yourself free. I would love to share this with you, and am thinking about setting up a FREE Google Hangout or webinar where we can visit with one another and share ideas, insight and solid methods for reaching our highest potential. Always the coach and healer, I want to share these simple steps with you. Stay close. Information is coming.

If you are interested in speaking with me directly, reply to this email or contact me for a FREE 30 minute consultation. I reply within 2 business days, if not sooner, and I’d love to speak with you.

Blessings. Gratitude. Love.