Crystal, “Woo-Woo Magic” and Getting What You Want

“Attention energizes; intention transforms.” - Dr. Deepak Chopra We have heard that whatever we choose to focus on, we enliven and enlarge. Have you ever noticed that when you want something, say a new car, the one you want seems to pop up everywhere? When you’re in a good mood looking for parking, do you notice that the “parking gods” seem to smile upon you and a convenient spot pops up for you? How about if you thought about having a baby; did you ever notice how many babies or pregnant women seemed to pop into your existence? The same is true for what we don’t want. Have you ever started your day off on the wrong foot and noticed that everything went wrong?

Often we know what we don’t want, but when asked what we do want, we struggle with the answer. I sometimes hear from new clients how things seem to keep going in the wrong direction, particularly in certain areas of their lives. For some, it is around relationships, for others, money. For some, it is recapturing their health in the form of a healthy weight, physical fitness or simply the energy to complete daily tasks in their busy lives.

What happens when we become mired in thoughts around what we don’t want is that we attract more of what we don’t want. Simple enough, right? Taking a not-so-big logical leap, we can also say that when we become mired in thoughts around what we do want, we will attract more of that as well. Here is where the “Crystal, ‘Woo-Woo Magic’ and Getting What You Want” comes into play. There’s nothing mysterious or woo-woo about this, really, but it is quite magical. When you focus on what you want, you will attract more of what you want.

The key to really getting what you want is becoming crystal clear about it. The quote by Chopra above states it beautifully: attention energizes; intention transforms. So, before we focus-in on getting what we want, we need to be so clear about what it is so that we can set the intention of bringing it into our lives. There are many schools of thought on how to do this, but to me it is very simple:

1. Dream Big. Ask yourself this: “If I could wave a magic wand and have exactly what I want, how would that look?” Allow yourself to think outside of what you think you ‘ought to’ or ‘should’ have. Go for what you really want and start to envision that. Close your eyes and picture it, in detail. Notice colors, sensations and maybe even smells or sounds.
2. Notice Negativity and Release It. Do not resist the negative thoughts that arise. If you find yourself thinking, “That will NEVER happen! How silly to wish for something so outrageous!” do not resist the feeling. Acknowledge it, allow it to flow thru and out, and then make a choice to either believe the negative thought or not to believe it.
3. Take Action. Once you know what you really want, don’t worry too much about drawing-up the plan. When you know what you want and set your intention, the “how” and the steps needed make themselves very clear. Does this mean to not get organized or use plans? Not at all, but if you are clear on what you want, then even the making of the plan gets you closer to your dream. Take one step toward your goal or dream every day. Break it down, be inspired, tap-in to your vision and your intention, and watch your dream move closer to you every day.

This is the “woo-woo magic” of the Law of Attraction, Law of Intention and Law of Least Effort combined. You don’t need to understand or even pay attention to these laws. Just keep in mind that whatever we choose to give attention to, we enliven.

So, dream big, set your intention and take action. It’s that simple.

Blessings. Gratitude. Love.

(Photo credit: http://hopeinvain.com)

Learning to Fly - a personal note from Tracy

I wanted to share something personal with you this week - a learning experience worth sharing. I have been digging deeper in my own personal development work, and encountered some deep-seated fears and old feelings that no longer serve me. I have always been quite courageous and willing to take action in spite of fear, but I’ll be VERY honest: I wanted to throw my hands in the air and just run away. Of course, that feeling only lasts for a fleeting moment, but in getting to ‘that place’ and allowing myself to feel the feelings associated with the thoughts, I discovered a strength I had yet to fully tap into - the ability to let go. To really let go. To allow myself to explore the worst fear, visualize what that might bring me, how “bad” it could possibly be. The feelings associated with the fear were enlightening; I discovered that I had developed the habit of holding tension and negative feelings in my body. I also discovered intense anger when I allowed the feelings to bubble-up. Once I allowed myself to feel which feelings and emotions were attached to the thoughts and fears, compassion and tenderness overtook me. From that compassion came the release. I felt for the first time that I had let go of the hold I had let the past have on me that was keeping me from reaching some of my goals, and worse: kept me from believing I deserve to achieve them.

Have you ever wondered why you “can’t” get past something, or why you’re not able to reach your goals fully, or why things “keep happening”? It is entirely possible that you have not released the thoughts AND feelings that aren’t truly aligned with who you are today. We often go to therapy, work thru our past and think we should be prepared to go flying straight ahead... This is not usually the case.

Though it’s not easy, there is a simple process you can work thru to learn how to let go and set yourself free. I would love to share this with you, and am thinking about setting up a FREE Google Hangout or webinar where we can visit with one another and share ideas, insight and solid methods for reaching our highest potential. Always the coach and healer, I want to share these simple steps with you. Stay close. Information is coming.

If you are interested in speaking with me directly, reply to this email or contact me for a FREE 30 minute consultation. I reply within 2 business days, if not sooner, and I’d love to speak with you.

Blessings. Gratitude. Love.

I’m SO MAD! Re-direct your power to move forward

“When angry, count to four. When very angry, swear.” - Mark Twain Modern psychology tells us that anger is a secondary emotion rooted in an unmet need, or an immediate response to a primary emotion. It is a response to physical or psychological pain. Anger is powerful and can be used to a positive or negative end. When we feel angry, the brain downshifts to a lower emotional and evolutionary function. Anger is a survival tool that has evolved from the highly effective fight-or-flight response in primitive times when large animals posed a real threat to humans.

If anger is a survival tool, but a secondary response, how can we use it to benefit ourselves and those in our lives? In general I believe that we need to identify the feeling and work with it; but that is a bit simplistic. However, there is something to it. Rather than digging deep into your psyche, I would like to offer a way to re-program your response to anger, and help you re-direct your energy when you feel it lifting it’s head and rising in your body.

“Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.” - Buddha

Repressed, prolonged anger is very unhealthy. Some studies show that anger can lead to a weakened heart and stiffening of the arteries. Liver and kidney damage and high cholesterol have been inked to prolonged anger. It can also cause accompanying issues, including depression and anxiety.

To protect your health and wellbeing, it is vitally important to understand your own triggers. Immediately preceding anger, you might feel:

• afraid
• attacked
• offended
• disrespected
• forced
• trapped
• pressured

This is a pretty good list to help you understand the origins of anger. When I look at the list of primary feelings, I see a common theme: loss of power. When I reflect upon my own anger, I see that when I feel angry, it is always associated with feeling powerless. In these moments, the fight-or-flight response kicks in and I feel my heart rate increase, tension building in my body and the need to strike out or get away from the situation or person that has caused this feeling. I openly admit that I do not always practice what I am about to preach, but every time I do, I feel empowered and in control of my own emotional wellbeing. If you want to feel better, be more in control of your overall wellbeing, then try the following when you feel angry:

Stop Everything. Take Mark Twain’s advice: take a breath and count. This will help stop the trigger from taking full effect and traveling the same pathway as your old reaction. Re-direct your rapid response to the initial emotion, which probably stems from something in the list above. When you quickly stop the response, it gives you time to alter course. If your old emotional response is anger, denial, sadness or some other less productive means, this is an excellent start. If you do nothing more from here, you’ve already made an incredibly relevant change in your life.

Find an Outlet. You’ve counted to four, ten, one hundred, maybe even cursed... Now what? Perhaps the anger has built-up as tension in your body and you need to release it. Sometimes we need to move our body to “get it out.” Stop everything, announce (if appropriate) that you feel angry and need to get some fresh air, then go take a walk. You might feel like you need something more forceful than walking. Try punching pillows or a mattress. You might consider taking a boxing, kickboxing, martial arts, dance, yoga or bootcamp class.

If you are vocal and you need to let it out with your voice, scream into a pillow - a primal release. Your throat might feel a little sore, but you will release it. You may need need a more cerebral activity. Try singing, listening to music, writing, painting, drawing, meditating, or anything that brings you relief. Enroll in a class to learn something you’ve always wanted to learn. Perhaps you can find a cooking, art, music or writing class.

Practice Compassion. Be forgiving and patient - with yourself and others. Cut yourself some slack. Try seeing things thru the eyes of others, particularly when you feel angry toward someone. Imagine yourself behaving badly, ask yourself what might cause you to be rude, thoughtless, reckless, etc. Perfection is not the goal; feeling better is. Gaining an understanding of who you really are, having a say in the direction your life takes is what you want, isn’t it?

“Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing, there is a field. I will meet you there.” - Jalal ad-Din Rumi

Along the way, you will no doubt have moments when you want to place blame, stuff-down or externalize your feelings. You have been wronged, you feel a sense of injustice, someone has hurt you or someone you love. This is normal, and you are not alone. However, when you take a moment to stop your automatic, pre-programmed response to wrongdoing, you will begin to find your power. Your feelings will feel safer, you will have more control over your life and you will feel better.

If you take-up a new activity to fill-in the negative spaces with positive activities and thoughts that facilitate a new outlook, you will see your life open up before you. When you take yourself out of your old patterns, you are already making a positive change in your life. You have the power to do this. Re-direct one thought at a time. Rome was not built in day, and neither are healthy habits. You are a work in progress, and construction can sometimes be messy, loud and disruptive. However, if you keep your eye on the prize and recognize the small changes along the way, you will also experience the joys along the way.

Blessings. Gratitude. Love.

Supporting References:

http://science.howstuffworks.com/environmental/life/human-biology/anger2.htm

http://counselingdelosreyes.com/Anger_Management/Understand_Anger.htm

What to do When You Don't Know What to do: A helpful guide to decision making

“Never try to solve all the problems at once - make them line up for you one-by-one.”  - Richard Sloma Do you ever need to make a decision and feel stuck? Sometimes we have several decisions to make at once, or a larger problem that feels insurmountable, and all we want to do is crawl back into bed and pull the covers over our heads. Who has not been there? I sure have, at least once, and maybe even twice. OK, I have probably been there a lot more than twice, but I digress...

When we are faced with a problem or a very important decision, why is it that we often go into a state of panic, overwhelm, denial, blame, avoidance or procrastination? There are a number of possible reasons, including, but not limited to: fear, lack of self-confidence, buying-in to others’ influence (good, bad or indifferent) or a sincere lack of knowledge about the subject at hand. As a regular human being, I can say I’ve experienced all of the above, and even had a touch of that as recently as last week. As a success coach, however, I will pose the following for you to consider:

It is what it is. So what? Now what?

1. It is what it is. OK, ‘it’ has happened or presented itself. So there it is, in front of you, the elephant in the corner. You can close your eyes and pretend you don’t see it, but you already saw it, you can sense it, and you have an acute awareness of it’s presence. If it is an event from the past, then you are now facing it in the present. Whatever the case, accept that it is there; it just is.
2. So what? What do you want to do about ‘it’? Is it life-threatening? If so, you know what to do, right? Call 9-1-1, run away or protect yourself somehow. But, it is likely NOT threatening your life, and it is now time to decide what to do. How would you like the outcome to look? Is your desired outcome specific and realistic? Is it in-line with your core values? Decide what you really want to do about it.
3. Now what? What are you willing to do about it? What action steps are you willing to take right now to achieve the end you desire? Decide what you can and will do, then break it down and devise the plan to get to the end you picture.

Once you have worked your way thru the above thought process, now create momentum. Put your action plan into action. If the plan seems too grand, break it down into smaller steps, and then take the easiest or most logical step. If you still feel stuck, take a step back and examine with softer eyes; notice that it is not as large as you once perceived. So, with soft eyes and a smaller task at hand, take a step.

Still daunting? Work backward from the end result to where you are now and figure out what makes sense or what is easiest to do first, and then take a step. As Franklin D. Roosevelt once said, “One thing is sure. We have to do something. We have to do the best we know at the moment... If it doesn’t turn out right, we can modify as we go along.” You can always modify the plan if the trajectory ahead looks like it’s not going toward the end you envisioned, but you must get started.

As a recovering perfectionist, I have gotten caught-up many times in the process of analyzing the problem or the multiple possible solutions rather than doing something to pave the path to the solution, either for fear of failure, or quite possibly for fear of success. So, do something, anything to create momentum. You are smart, experienced and perfectly capable of changing course if you discover that the plan you execute is moving you in a direction that does not contribute to your overall wellbeing.

“You don’t drown by falling in the water; you drown by staying there.” - Edwin Louis Cole

One thing is certain: if you choose to stay in one place, you will remain in that place. If that is uncomfortably comfortable, then it is time to make a change, take the decision that feels right, or take the decision that feels uncomfortable and pushes you beyond your comfort zone. When you push yourself beyond your comfort zone, you will grow. How you envision your success will expand and you will begin to make decisions effortlessly, and the work will feel effortless, no matter how “hard” it is.

It’s not about a task “being easy” but the feeling of effortless draw as you begin to create momentum. Momentum is your friend, if you create it. There are times when we need to fix our eyes on the desired outcome, and that will propel us forward. However, there are plenty of times in life when we simply need to get started. The best way to get started is to think about and envision the goal, and then create a plan from there (and note that thinking about the outcome, envisioning the goal and creating the plan are steps taken, so you have already created momentum.) Once you have a plan, you can adjust as necessary, but in order to get anywhere near the finish line, you must take the necessary steps and keep going. Remember the “Little Engine That Could”? She kept moving forward, with a positive attitude, believing that she could do it, saying to herself, “I think I can...” Well, I KNOW you can, so put one foot in front of the other, create forward momentum and keep going.

When we become crystal clear about what we want, focus on creating the path, and then take the path, we can achieve anything.

Blessings. Gratitude. Love.

More Translations. Today: FML (hint, NOT Family Medical Leave...)

No, FML is not the "Family Medical Leave (Act)" though that would be more palatable, to be sure. FML, loosely translated, is "F__(orget) My Life" and it makes me cringe, A LOT! I want to teach you how to shift from frustration to powerful and happy thoughts...

So what do you do now? You’re having a bad moment/day/week/month/year. OK.

Remember me? I’m the Silver Lining Chick & Realist’s love child. So here’s the deal: If you feel like your life is out of control, throwing your hands up in the air is not the answer. It may feel good in the moment, but the second you say something like, "FML" or "Life Sucks" or "Bad things ALWAYS happen to me" or "It's ALWAYS SOMETHING", or “Things NEVER work for me!” guess what? You're right!!! You've informed every cell in your body that bad stuff is going to go down - always, and that informs your every thought and action. Yes, it does.

When life bites you in the rear, as it is occasionally, apparently entitled to do, here’s what you need to know for a quick turn-around:

1. STOP, drop and (let it) roll. No fire here. Just stop what you’re doing. Now. Stop.
2. Take charge of your thoughts. Stop what you’re thinking. If you are sitting, stand up. If you are standing, sit down or walk around. If you are holding something in one hand, switch hands. You have now interrupted the pattern.
3. Say these three letters and commit them to your new story memory:    CML = Command of My Life

That’s it. That is the Secret. You get to choose. You are in Command of your life. Simple as that. Change how you’re thinking. Is everything sunshine and lollipops? Well... I didn’t say that, remember there’s a lot of realist in me. But, when you change your thoughts and interrupt an old or negative thought pattern, you get to re-align your cognition (thoughts) and in doing so, you project your presence forward into the next set of thoughts, and then you feel differently, you behave differently, you choose differently, and you get different results.

Think, Einstein: “Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.”

So, flip the switch. Switch hands, stand up, sit down, stop, drop and roll. Interrupt the pattern. It’s a practice. Once you start and become consciously aware of interrupting the old and replacing with something new, you will create effortless momentum. Yes, it is that simple.

No more FML. No more “ALWAYS-NEVER” thoughts. If you catch it, flip it. That’s it.

Go, have fun and Take Command of Your Life. I think you’ll be glad you did!

Blessings. Gratitude. Love.

WTF Translated (hint: it’s not as bad as you think)

“The positive thinker sees the invisible, feels the intangible and achieves the impossible.” ~ Unknown Do you ever find yourself thinking really negative thoughts? Have you ever been caught off-guard by something “bad” or a series of “bad stuff” seemingly stacking-up against you? Do you then you ask yourself, “WTF?” (loosely translated, “What in the world?!”)

I’m a huge fan of overcoming old stuff and re-writing the story, which you’ll occasionally hear me say this way: Time to update your story. We get to choose how we see things. While we cannot have control over our surroundings or things that happen around or to us, we can certainly control or re-direct our thoughts to make things better for ourselves.

In our first interview crafting her Vision of Success, a now graduated client told me, “I want to log in to my bank account and not ask myself, ‘WTF??!!’ I just want to feel relaxed about it all.” After we had a clear picture of what she wanted for her finances and other areas of life, I worked-in the WTF and re-directed it in a way to not only make her giggle, but to also feel good about where she was headed. You see, as a coach, I get to see your life from a different perspective, and I can see your potential ~ and it excites and inspires me to no end!

So, re-direct and re-work the proverbial “WTF” from its original meaning (again, loosely translated, “What in the world?!”) to this:

WTF = Well, That’s FANTASTIC!!

Every upset, every unpleasant surprise, every dollar we wish we had, brings us the opportunity to change how we see and experience our life circumstances. When we think in positive terms, we can see things we never saw before, feel things we were never able to feel and achieve things we once thought were impossible.

Am I saying that you should think in terms of sunshine and lolipops? Not at all... That would be so fake that your subconscious would laugh you right out of your own head. But if you ask yourself what you are learning, IF you could learn something, and how you can take it and make something good out of it, then you are likely to change not only the way you see things, but how you DO things.

Trust me.

It takes some work, a little mindfulness, a wee bit of “fake it ‘til you make it” mentality, but you will notice a change.

Here’s what you need to do when something goes awfully wrong:

1. Breathe. This is not only a sign of life, it will bring your blood pressure under control (really, it will) and help you pause for a moment before you toss the baby out with the bathwater
2. Ask questions. What am I learning? Is there a way to turn this into something good?
3. Trust yourself; you know more than you think you do. Know that you always know what’s best for you, so if you make a choice to see and do things differently, then you will, and it’ll ultimately turn out well (or at least teach you something you were meant to learn)

Having a positive attitude is only part of the picture, but this is a great start and will get you moving in the right direction. Next week I will teach you a way to shift the “FML” mentality to something more productive and positive. Until then, remember Well, that’s FANTASTIC! And you will at least laugh a little, if not make a positive change by thinking differently.

Life happens. Own it and make the best of it.

Blessings. Gratitude. Love.

Lookie!! What we see when we reflect

“Upon reflection, I see where I’ve gone right. Upon reflection, I see where I’ve gone wrong. Upon reflection, I recognize I’ve taken a number of leaps of faith - BIG, HUGE ones (yay me!) Upon reflection, I see myself in my parents, friends and family members. Upon reflection, I see myself in my children’s eyes.” ~ TLC We see parts of ourselves in everyone we meet, even when we meet someone we don’t care for much. So, rather than have visceral reactions to people who rub us the wrong way, we can ask ourselves what we see in them that bothers us, and if there is something we can learn to change or appreciate about ourselves in a different way.

I love this word: reflection. I love it because we can think, muse and take a look in the proverbial mirror. What do you see when you look in the mirror?

We can even reflect verbally. When someone’s words feel critical, how do you respond? Do you feel tension in your body? When you answer, do you get defensive? Rather than react, you can reflect: “Hmm...” (My favorite word!) “I’m hearing you say that you don’t appreciate (X) about the way I answered. Is that true?” Often people simply aren’t aware of their tone, but sometimes people passively, or not so passively, behave in an aggressive manner. When this is the case and you reflect back what you’ve heard, you are in a great position to possibly help someone learn something while protecting yourself and your integrity.

Do not engage. Just don’t...

A good friend taught me the “Q-TIP Method” of disengaging: Quit Taking It Personally. I use it a lot with my kids, and have learned that when there are people who seem hell-bent on sharing their opinions in ways that might not feel good to me, I think to myself, "Q-TIP!" and am able to smile inside and take a breath.

So, going back to when you say, “Hmmm,” know that you are effectively giving yourself a moment to switch to Q-TIP mode and disengage. Then, if you choose to reflect to the other person, you can do it in a way that is not offensive or rude; you are simply reflecting back what they’ve said to you.

Another method of reflection mirrors the thought for the week - consider this when observing nature outdoors, your own nature and that of others. Let your observation be diligent, your reflection profound and your experiments exact (in other words, take your time, observe, think, come up with a plan and THEN move forward).

THOUGHT FOR THE WEEK:

“Our observation of nature must be diligent, our reflection profound, and our experiments exact. We rarely see these three means combined: and for this reason, creative geniuses are not common.” ~ Denis Diderot

I wish you the best week as you learn to enjoy your reflection, use the Q-TIP Method and create the best, most passion-filled life you ever dreamed of.

Blessings. Gratitude. Love.

The Elephant in the Room

Have you ever noticed that things seem to happen in groups of three? Do you pay attention? What do you notice by the third time? Do you think it’s a sign from greater powers? Or maybe your subconscious mind is bringing your awareness to something that needs attention. Regardless of religious or spiritual beliefs and leanings, many people feel they are being offered a sign when something happens for the third time. I recently experienced a profoundly spiritual encounter with what I am now convinced is my animal totem: elephants. I admire this gorgeous creature for its strength, peace, love, leadership, connection to ancient wisdom and incredible memory. I developed an affinity for elephants while I was pregnant with my daughter, a time when I transitioned from free and unencumbered to responsible, deeply connected to my own self and profoundly grateful for the power of my femininity. Over the past few months, I have re-connected with elephants in three different ways.

First, at a Reike treatment, I told the master that my intention was to release old thought patterns around money, my relationship with myself in my new role as provider for my family, and fears around the control I allowed money to have over me in the past. I entered the session with open heart and mind, ready to release the things I was tired of talking and worrying about, and just wanted to feel a sense of freedom and acceptance of my life and circumstances, even as I continued working toward painting a better financial picture for myself and my children.

The session was amazing. A number of emotions welled-up, and snap shot moments presented, including an emotional release with tears of gratitude for a life of abundance, and envisioning very distinct colors and images, not least of which was an elephant. This elephant was adorned in jewel tones and golden baubles, and walked toward me slowly, with purpose. As the elephant approached from the upper left quadrant of my view, seemingly floating on air, I felt a sense of calm, knowing that this massively powerful creature, though it was coming directly toward me, was sent for me and that I needed to be courageous and open to receive its message. When it passed by me, I heard a whisper, “Let go. The elephant always knows and will carry it for you. The elephant always remembers.” In that moment, I felt an incredible shift, as if something that had been attached to my insides was released, and I was free to move with ease and comfort, both physically and emotionally.

When the session was finished, I shared the elephant experience with the Reike master and her eyes welled-up with tears. She was quiet for a moment, and then said, “I dreamt last night that I was giving away elephants, and was completely perplexed by it. I understand now that it was for you.” The session was extremely powerful, and I felt tired and exhilarated at the same time. I left with a sense of peace and a clear understanding that I chose to accept and receive the elephant’s message, see the colors and enjoy the release to the fullest extent possible. I was able to give away the old thoughts and beliefs of the past that no longer served me; the elephant would carry it for me. I have continued the practice of releasing the past and letting go of old thought patterns - thru meditation, deep breathing, writing and mindfulness.

The knowledge of the past stays with us. To let go is to release the images and emotions, the grudges and fears, the clingings and disappointments of the past that bind our spirit. - Jack Kornfield

My elephant experience continues to a more recent time. I met a very nice man while out with friends one night. We exchanged business cards, as all “good” Washingtonians do, even while out on the town, and he called me a few days later. He remembered much more of the details of our conversation than I did (it was girls’ night out and I was not particularly bothered with remembering anyone I spoke to that night, much less the details of any conversations.) In my amazement over how much he remembered from our conversation, I playfully told him he had the memory of an elephant. As our friendship progressed, he remembered the elephant joke on my birthday, and gave me the most adorable stuffed elephant as part of my gift. The moment I opened the package, I felt a rush of energy and felt my heart burst open, as if this little stuffed animal could really carry the memories for me and help lessen my load. In the same moment I felt intense gratitude for meeting a person who paid attention to what I had said, and obviously read my cues much more deeply than I realized. That gift is more precious to me than anything I have ever received, besides my children.

A few weeks later while I was meditating, I was searching for inspiration and focus, and thought to pull a card from the Ask and it is Given deck, and what landed on top after a shuffle or two was a card with the picture of an elephant, reminding me that every request is granted, and there is always enough for all. With that focus in mind, I started reciting the prosperity and abundance mantra I was practicing for 40 days. What happened next amazed me and brings me to tears, even in this moment. I became overcome with a feeling of relief, and release. Tears began to stream down my face, and as I let go of the weight I’d been carrying, I started saying between mantras, “Thank you! I know.” Within a few moments of this immense relief and gratitude, the same elephant from the Reike session approached from the upper left quadrant of my mind’s eye, at the same pace, adorned in the same jewel tones and golden baubles. As it walked past me, I heard the same whisper, ‘Let go. The elephant always knows and will carry it for you. The elephant always remembers.’

That day was a bit of a blur, as I relaxed-in to knowing that I have (finally) allowed myself to release the burden of the past, the fears of the present and the unknown, and have let go of the old thought patterns. I allowed myself to take care of a long list of small tasks that had overwhelmed me before, but I always felt I shouldn’t attend to because I had more pressing things to do. I just took care of business, and released the burden; I knocked-down barriers in my own mind by clearing out the things that were holding me back, now no longer tightly-held inside of me. I felt a sense of calm knowing that all is well in my world; that the affirmation I have breathed into my life is so real and true: I am love, all is well.

The next day the same adorned elephant visited me during my meditation, only this time, it stopped in front of me, bowed its head and I was able to kiss it on the forehead, at the location of the sixth chakra, also called the third eye in yoga, the gate to higher consciousness and perception. The rest of my meditation, I felt as if I was floating on air, that I would soon know the answers to questions I’d been asking, and that I could rest-in to the knowledge that I am supported by my source, my faith and belief in myself, and the tribe I have gathered around me.

The third experience expanded into a greater connection with my daughter, who I recently learned can see auras, or colors, around people. We were talking about it that day and when she saw the stuffed elephant sitting on the dining room table, she said, “That elephant is very special to you, isn’t it?” When I told her that a good friend had given it to me and that it felt very special when I opened the gift, it occurred to me to ask her what color she saw around the fuzzy little inanimate object. She stopped, looked, and declared, “Yellow.”

Here is where it gets just a little “trippy” for me... I confess limited knowledge of Hinduism or the story of Ganesha, the remover of obstacles, Lord of Success and deity that destroys pride and ego, ultimately uniting us with a large, universal ego (i.e. “we are one”). I had looked it up after a discussion with my business partner, who is also my very good friend. She also has an affinity for elephants, in particular Ganesha, after a beautiful spiritual experience in India in her early 20s (I will elaborate on this in my upcoming book, where I tell more detailed stories.)

On reading the story of Ganesha, the man with the head of the elephant, I learned that he is also the guardian of the third chakra, the solar plexus, which corresponds to the color yellow. And, if that isn’t enough to knock your socks off, when I shared this story with the giver of the stuffed elephant (who at this point I was sure would want to run screaming from me, the crazy woman who sees elephants while meditating) said, “Wow... I am amazed and impressed. Did you know my favorite color is yellow?”’

I don’t know what to say about all of this, except that I felt completely humbled after piecing all of this together. First, I believe that my daughter is a gift to me for healing and grounding, and probably also for knocking down barriers; she is totally fearless and beautifully self-assured. Second, I have needed a lot of support and guidance in getting past roadblocks, both real and self-inflicted, and it is not at all surprising to me that elephants would be part of my journey. Elephants are graceful on their feet, strong and have a lot of style. They teach us to hear the truth in our own voices and have the ability to push over large obstacles with a gentle touch, showing us that strength can also be gentle. Elephant matriarchs lead with love and inclusion, and are fiercely loyal. Not only do I relate to the elephant, but I am paying attention to the significance of it appearing to me in three ways, all from what seemed like forces outside of me, and yet, not really.

Finally, I feel blessed. There have been times in my life when I have felt so different that I felt all alone in this world. I now understand that in my awareness, in my willingness to be open to the messages that are sent to me by higher powers, or from me to myself, I am never alone. Ever. So, when you receive a message, in whatever form, three times, will you pay attention? Will you sit up and listen? I invite you to enjoy the message and allow yourself to take inspired action with the wisdom you receive, which is likely your own wisdom.

Are you willing to love yourself enough to listen to your own message?

Blessings. Gratitude. Love.

Pinch Me, I’m Dreaming! Using dreams as a guide

“A dreamer is one who can only find his way by moonlight, and his punishment is that he sees the dawn before the rest of the world.” - Oscar Wilde

Our dreams tell us a lot. Sometimes the brain is simply uploading and organizing information while we sleep, and this is one of the reasons why sleep is critical to our overall wellbeing. However, our dreams can also give us insight to our internal workings when we are processing information from our waking life. If you are trying to sort out an emotional situation or if you are ignoring something, the brain and subconscious have a way of bringing you to attention by sending you a whopper of a dream. Some people experience recurring dreams. Some experience chasing, scary or euphoric hero dreams. All of this is your subconscious sorting out situations and input from your waking life.

The study of dream analysis has been varied over the years. In ancient Egypt and Greece, dreams were seen as a supernatural communication or as a means of divine intervention. In Europe toward the end of the 19th century, dreams were used as an integral part of psychoanalysis, and the perceived content of those dreams was said to reveal the latent meaning to the psyche of the dreamer (Sigmund Freud’s work The Interpretation of Dreams is a famous and relevant example of dream interpretation.)

While I believe that dreams offer us some juicy symbolism for our waking lives, I also like the word “dream” for how we see our lives unfolding. Our hopes and aspirations are also “dreams.” When I was younger, I had a number of dreams: go to college, grad school, get married, have a couple of children, own a home, etc. I have achieved all of those dreams, yet I still see my complete dream as unfulfilled. I continue to expand the idea of that dream and fill it in with some very interesting and fun experiences, new people and brighter outlook.

How do you feel about your dreams? Are they still alive? Have you ever felt like your dream was shattered? I have. When my marriage ended, I had to examine what my dream was, why it felt shattered into a million bits, and whether my dream was really my own, or something I had worked toward because I thought that was what I was supposed to be doing. I have since learned that my dreams were tied into what I believed I was supposed to be doing, what I believed I should dream of. I had coffee with an amazing coach, Margie Warrell, and she said we all need to stop “should-ing on” ourselves. The moment we use the word “should” we are already wrong, because “should” automatically places judgment on ourselves or others.

I want to tie this to dreams because as my life unfolds, I open myself to all the possibilities and watch everything come together, I recognize that when I stopped “should-ing on” myself and allowing myself to dream of what I really want, I started to feel free. That freedom has allowed me to expand my dreams and aspirations. Now my dream includes expanding my business, helping people change their lives, hopes for my children, our life together and a whole host of future experiences.

Would you like to fulfill your dreams? How can you do that? I can help you get the ball rolling, with a few easy steps. What lies ahead might seem somewhat disjointed, but I assure you that you will enjoy changes and see results almost immediately if you open your mind and heart to creatively choosing a new path for yourself.

“Dream as if you’ll live forever, live as if you’ll die today.” - James Dean

1. Dream big. Write down what you want from life. Be adventurous, bold and aim high. Write it out with specifics like places you want to visit, things you want to see, the salary you know you deserve and how you envision your life in the bigger picture. When we put it down on paper, it becomes more real to us. You can get more specific by setting mini-goals to keep you going, or keep it big picture, stretched-out across the horizon.

2. Pay attention to your dreams. Your dreams can shed a lot of light on your waking life. If you have a very symbolic dream that leaves you scratching your head, write it out and jot down your thoughts on what it could mean in your life. I often refer to a dream analysis website when I have a crazy dream that needs some more thought, and I pulled some basic symbolism for you to shed some light on your own dreams:

Recurring Dreams: indicates unresolved issues or unhealthy patterns

Nightmares: suggests that there is an unresolved issue with emotional or frightening content, perhaps a health issue you have been avoiding

Chasing Dreams: a metaphor for some type of insecurity. You are avoiding a situation you think is not conquerable

Animals: your own physical characteristics, primitive desires or sexual nature, depending on the animal.

3. Try lucid dreaming. Lucid dreams occur when you are somewhere between asleep and awake. In a lucid dream, you can actively participate in, and manipulate, imaginary experiences in the dream. You can confront perceived threats and improve your self-confidence. Using lucid dreams can help you sort out a problem from your waking life and visualize and practice asking for what you want and need - practice a speech, prepare for an event, ask for a raise, etc.

Set high goals for yourself, give yourself permission to touch and embrace your dreams. Be mindful of what your subconscious is telling you while you sleep. Use the symbolism to sort out issues you may have buried that need attention. Your dreams can guide you to your better path, to the life you want, if you are willing to listen and take action to change your life.

Blessings. Gratitude. Love.